In the age of relentless hustle and constant grind, finding your true self can feel like a quest for the Holy Grail. Yet, one brave soul, Taya Stapelfeldt, recently shared her extraordinary journey on the Live Wide Awake, our founder Steph Dickson’s podcast, revealing how she shattered the societal matrix to live a life brimming with authenticity and inner power.
Taya’s journey began with a moment of profound vulnerability. She recalls a day when she hit rock bottom, physically collapsing in her apartment, convinced she was having a heart attack. The ambulance arrived, but the diagnosis was not a physical ailment—it was a manifestation of emotional and psychological burnout. This breakdown occurred at a time when she ostensibly had everything she had ever wanted. “My life was exactly what I thought I wanted,” Taya explained, yet she found herself utterly broken on the floor. This poignant moment was the catalyst for a significant shift in her life.
In a candid conversation, Taya opens up about her journey of self-discovery, the pivotal moments that changed her life, and how she helps others tap into their inner power. In this interview, Taya shares her insights on vulnerability, trauma, and the transformative power of deep work.
Here are some of the highlights from Taya’s sharing.
Trapped in the matrix of willpower and ego-driven dreams
There was really a moment in my life when I hit rock bottom where I was literally down on the floor. I broke down, I was on the floor in my apartment one day and I couldn’t move anymore. I really literally thought I had a heart attack, I called an ambulance and they came and they just said there was nothing. This level of embarrassment and shame and confusion, can you imagine how I felt? It was completely devastating.
My life was exactly what I thought I wanted, but there I found myself on the floor, broken down, like destroyed. And there was this moment when suddenly everything changed like total peace, as if the only way was in, the only way was surrendering. And in this very moment, I knew that I would change my life forever.
I never went back to my job, to my career. And quite frankly, I changed my life in quite a brutal way. This was 15 years ago, today there are so many more tools, amazing people who’ve already done the work. It’s so much more accessible to change your life when actually you feel that you haven’t lived from your true self, that you haven’t lived from your true core.
At some point your body just tells you. It can have a breakdown and burnout and depression and addiction, there are so many different forms. And often, what I see with my amazing high achieving women clients, it’s the moment when you think you have it all, at least what you thought you always wanted.
The body stores trauma until we are ready to face it
Trauma is a natural part of life, and our bodies store it until we’re strong enough to deal with it. Ironically, it’s often when we achieve everything we thought we wanted that our subconscious urges us to confront these deeper issues. It’s so much more accessible to change your life when actually you feel that you haven’t lived from your true self, that you haven’t lived from your true core.
When we reach the peak of our external achievements, the unresolved inner turmoil often surfaces, pushing us to reevaluate and realign with our true selves. It’s about doing the deep work and tapping into our innate power. This energy has always been within us; we just need to access it. Often, people come to me with specific problems, but these are just entry points to unlocking their deeper power. By shifting the focus from problem-solving to energy tapping, we can see changes across all areas of life.
Early on we learn to split up, repress from other parts inside of us that are actually a source of intuition, aliveness, instinct, self -trust, sensuality. All the good stuff doesn’t really happen in your head, right? But in daily life, we pretend that this is the way to live today.
We’re actually creating this matrix that we don’t want to live in, that we long to escape from every day.
We’re part of it until that moment when we allow it to break open. And as in my story, in the moment when I broke down, I was flushed with memories, flashing through my whole system of what I had with so much extra effort buried deep inside of me. Then I realised ‘wow, I’m strong, I’ve achieved this, I’ve got it all, I am a mom, I have the soul partner, I have the career I ever wanted’. Ironically, it’s almost as if our subconscious is almost saying just great, you did it, you made it, you managed this level, it’s time for the next. And that’s when we break open. And we fight it, why? Because we achieved everything that we wanted.
Transforming trauma into power through somatic mentorship
True lasting change comes from integration. In my somatic mentorships, we dive deep, working through the blocks and traumas stored in the body. It’s not about fixing everything but about making it a way of life to live from your innate power. This approach transforms how you relate to yourself, others, and the world.
Over the years I have come to the conclusion that to really see results in real life, it needs a lot of integration. So the programs that I deeply believe in and see the most mind-blowing results, that last and shift people for decades, where they really come back into their innate blueprint and really walk their path, are what I call somatic mentorships.
These one-on-one programs involve long deep sessions where we find your deep innate power. We empower you so much that you feel that “Wow, I am literally ready to do whatever it takes”. And in that moment with this energy flow and this power, we actually allow a big old charge in the body, which is actually the core of any trauma.
It’s a charge in the body that gets reflected in your perception. When we think about perception, we speak about blind spots. But often people are not aware that these blind spots are actually coming from a somatic experience, an experience within the body somewhere where we’re holding a charge. You can call it a block or think of it like trapped/physical/emotional/energetic/sexual/whatever energy. It could be some kind of energy that was contracted in and left there because it was impossible to feel it at the time.
It was the right decision not to feel it, are burry it deep inside. But as long as we have these charges, it’s not really possible to be fully free and yourself.Let me stress that it’s not about becoming perfect and discharging and working through patterns and trauma forever. It is about tapping into it and making it a way of life to live from this innate power, this innate energy flow. And you can just trust that bit by bit you will encounter and feel these places in your body as symptoms, but you will understand the context of what you’re healing.
Routine can hinder your power
It’s first of all giving yourself a break and knowing that this new way of living it’s actually something outside of the metrics. And yet we still live in these metrics, right? That is a strong force. So again, we need to, you know, this life force energy I was speaking about, it’s powerful, but we also literally needed to again break through this matrix, the voices, the expectations, the rhythm out there to find our own rhythm. So again and again, but to realise that the power is there, that the energy is there, that our body doesn’t want to do anything more than accessing this energy, right?
To take the moment and drop into it and of course, there are the tools, right? There are a lot of tools such as knowing your own kind of places in your body, the way you are contracting, the way you cutting yourself up, the way of keeping yourself small, and then start really focusing on the different areas to open up again. And yes, there are tools like somatic movement.
I make tailor -made recordings, right? Because I don’t want anyone to kind of fall into the trap of practising. It’s not really about practising every morning with your lemon water and doing the same thing. Then what do you create? You feel guilty if you didn’t practise one time. It’s like, you’re building a routine where you’re losing the power of the momentum, right? It’s really starting by deeply feeling into what is there right now today? How can I open it today? What for? What’s my intention? What I’m desiring today? It’s very unique, it’s very special. It’s knowing yourself so, so, so deeply.
Don’t try to fix your children, do the work first
I have a lot of parents wanting to send their kids to work with me and I always say “No, first you [the parents] do the work” and when we’re done within the process they just know what to do, what it takes and how to relate deeper to their children. It’s really not about being perfect. It’s about being real. It’s about really listening. It’s about really connecting and especially for women as mothers, when we tap into this deep, deep core connection it becomes clearer and clearer that when this channel is open, the soul partnership and the soul purpose or passion business that comes from your innate gift is also deeply connected to our desire for motherhood.
And that’s the same also for women who choose not to have children. They might instead have the desire to guide people or guide the younger generations or take care of their friends’ children or a godchild. This is a deep desire in us to understand that you are the expert of your own unique way of motherhood.
Working with Taya
The integration of these practices into daily life is crucial. Taya’s mentorship extends beyond individual sessions to ongoing support, helping clients embody their new states of being in all aspects of life. This holistic approach ensures that the transformations are not only profound but also lasting. It is about creating a way of life that is aligned with one’s true self, fostering authentic relationships, purposeful careers, and a deep sense of fulfilment.
Taya’s story and insights serve as a powerful reminder that the journey to authenticity and inner power is both challenging and deeply rewarding. By breaking free from the societal matrix and reconnecting with our true selves, we can lead lives that are not only successful by external standards but also profoundly fulfilling on a personal level. It is a journey of courage, vulnerability, and ultimately, profound transformation. As Taya’s experience shows, the path to true freedom lies within, waiting to be discovered and embraced.
If you want more…
Ready to ditch the hustle and embrace a life of authenticity and inner power? Taya Stapelfeldt’s story is your roadmap. Her journey from burnout to breakthrough teaches us that true freedom lies within, waiting to be discovered and embraced. Dive deeper into her wisdom by tuning into episodes 90 and 61 of the “Live Wide Awake” podcast, where Taya, the first repeat guest, shares even more insights and practical tips for living your best, most authentic life. Don’t miss it!
FEATURED IMAGE courtesy of Taya Stapelfeldt